Humbled

Not only did I join a new guild yesterday, I had my first raid with them in Heroic Ulduar.  Wow!  I had such a great time!  But over the course of the 3 and a half hours that we raided, I was incredibly humbled in two very different ways.

The raid was very organized, it started right on the dot, and everyone was very aware of what they should be doing and got it done like clockwork.  Everyone but me that is!  lol!  I didn’t actually expect to be tearing up all these Ulduar bosses I’d never seen before 12 hours after my guild invite.  It was a busy day and, although I read up on some of the bosses, I did not have time to study them all as I would normally have done.  Even so, the GM was great at giving rundowns of what we would be seeing on each boss and I managed to have a decent showing in terms of my healing despite my Naxx 25 gear.  We downed Flame Leviathan with 3 towers, XT002, Kologarn, Auriaya, Hodir, Thorim, Iron Council, and Ignis last night.  I got 6 achievements and a new necklace.  The guild was incredibly organized and paced.  It was a pleasure to be along for the ride.

But I died in a pancake.  I stood in some fire.  I was flash frozen on Hodir several times.  Overall, I was rather embarrassed by some of my missteps.  Don’t get me wrong.  The guild was exceptionally welcoming and kind.  They were extremely gracious about my mistakes and took it in stride that this was my first time seeing much of the content.  But I was still pretty hyper aware of my mistakes. Pretty humbled.

In my defense, however, not all of my clumsiness was due to the newness of all of this… new guild, new server, new addons, new raidmates, new strategies, new bosses, new voices, new names.  (Sylly, please rez so-and-so?  um…  can’t find him on my grid because I don’t know what color I’m looking for!  What class is he?  What class?  lol!).  While my awkwardness was certainly cause for humility and resolution to do better, there was a much deeper reason for me to be humbled last night than the surface details of the raid I was in.

While we raided, independently of one another and without knowledge that anyone else was doing the same thing, three of my friends from my old server came to my new realm and rolled alts, just so that they could whisper me to tell me that they loved me and that I would be missed.  One even named his alt “Lostnosyll.”  It was the sweetest, most touching, most unexpected and humbling thing I could imagine.  I honestly had not expected to get a whisper from a friend for weeks or months, until I actually made some new friends on my new server.  Yet here were three of the people I hold dear to my heart taking the time and making the effort to come and find me, just to make sure that I knew I was loved.  One of them actually farmed copper on his alt until he had enough that he could send me a letter in the mail telling me that I was important to him.

So the larger reason for my faltering performance, which had been pretty respectable up to Auriaya, was that it was at that point I started getting whispers from my old friends letting me know that I was loved and would be missed.  So when I was flash frozen in Hodir, it was because I was crying.

I have received such an incredible outpouring of affection from my friends and guildmates from my old guild that I am absolutely overwhelmed.  They have been here, posting on my blog.  They have emailed me.  They have called me and texted me.  They have come to roll new characters in a strange world in order to reach out to me.  I tell you honestly that this is so far beyond the scope of what I expected that I am truly, truly humbled.  Thanks to all of you.  I love you all and will make sure to come onto my alts on Duskwood to see you and make sure that you, too, know that you are loved.  My cup runneth over.

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